Warmth
by SlightlySpacey
Summary: Bella goes to visit Jacob. Takes place after Eclipse Let's just assume that Jacob didn't run off at the end *sob* That made me cry so much! Poor Jacob!


As usual, my poor old truck was wheezing from exhaustion by the time I pulled up to Jacob's place. I patted the steering wheel affectionately as I shut off the ignition. It had been running great for as long as I had been living in Forks, but recently it seemed to be struggling a little. I sighed, knowing that sooner or later Edward would insist on me getting a new fancy car of sorts. He really had little patience with my noisy truck. But I would truly hate parting from my old truck, especially considering how much time Jacob had once spent working on it…

I shook my head and stepped out of the truck, not wanting to be reminded of any painful memories involving Jacob. I had little time left as a human, and I didn't want to spend that time crying. I doubted I would be able to accomplish that. Just thinking about all the people I'd leave behind after Edward's teeth sunk into my skin made me teary-eyed… Charlie, Renee, Angela, Mike, the La Push guys, Jacob… Especially Jacob.

However, I couldn't help but grin as Jacob crawled out of his kitchen window and came to greet me at my truck. He was mostly fully clothed for once, through still lacking shoes. I was relieved to find him smiling _my_ smile. The smile that could make me forget about all my problems and reminded me why I loved this boy so much.

"Hey Bella!" he said, and pulled me into a bear hug before I could respond.

I tried to respond, but with my face squashed against his chest all that came out was a strangled "Mmph!"

I felt his chest rumble as he chuckled before setting me down.

"You know," I pointed out. "There's something called a front door."

Still grinning, he said, "But I was already in the kitchen."

"And it would have taken you a whole twenty seconds to walk and use a door. How terrible."

Abruptly, his face was serious. "It would have been a whole twenty seconds without you. And right now I'm going to take every second I can get."

He was still hoping. I felt something in my chest clench painfully, knowing how much Jacob loved me. It didn't help knowing that if I didn't love Edward so much, I would gladly submit to Jacob's desire.

I shook my head, trying to rid myself of these thoughts. I really didn't come here for any more complications. Yes, I loved Jacob. But I loved Edward more. And I knew that would never change. Edward and I belonged together. But that left Jacob…

Seeming to sense my discomfort, Jacob changed the subject. "Is something wrong with the truck?" he asked. "It sounds a little funny."

"Yeah," I said, relieved to be brought out of my troubling reverie. "It doesn't run as well as it did when I first got it."

"Want me to take a look at it?"

"Sure."

Jacob got behind the truck and started pushing it towards the garage. At first I tried to help him, not wanting him to do too much work on his own, but after tripping over my own feet and nearly slicing my head open on the edge of the license plate, I decided that he had everything under control.

"Are you sure you don't want a band-aid or something?" Jacob asked.

I rolled my eyes. "It's just a little cut, Jake," I told him, gently touching my wound. I felt slightly dizzy as I pulled my hand back to find my fingers covered in blood.

Jacob gave me one look before bounding back into the house. I sighed and leaned against the back of my truck, breathing out of my mouth and trying best not to think about the blood continuing to seep out of my forehead.

There were a few crashes from what I assumed was Jacob searching frantically for a band-aid. I waited patiently, and just a few seconds later Jacob came back with a first-aid kit.

"All I need is a band-aid," I told him. "You don't have to do surgery."

Jacob chose not to respond as he picked me up like a doll and plopped me on the side of my truck, setting the first-aid kit next to me.

"I feel like a little kid," I grumbled as he gently dabbed at my cut with a cotton swab.

"I thought you'd be used to it by now, seeing that you seem to main yourself everyday."

"I'm not _that_ much of a klutz."

"Yes you are." Jacob sighed. "I suppose that'll be one advantage of you being a vampire. You won't have to worry about this sort of thing."

I carefully examined his face, wondering why he suddenly decided to bring up my turning into a vampire. But his face was carefully composed into a hard mask.

"Jake, please don't do that."

Jacob blinked. "Do what?"

"Hide your emotions like that," I said. Jacob simply blinked in response, so I continued. "I… don't like not knowing how you feel. I want to be able to help you… I…" I looked down at my feet. "I want to understand how you feel. I told you this a million times already, but I miss my Jacob. The Jacob before the change. The Jacob who was always so carefree and wasn't afraid to tell me how he felt…"

I felt a lump start forming in my throat, and couldn't go on. I was aware of Jacob's hands gently pasting a band-aid over my cut, and then slowly moving down to cup the sides of my face.

"Bella." I looked up and saw the mask gone. Instead, Jacob's face contained so many emotions at once that I couldn't identify, I had no idea what he was feeling.

Time ceased to exist as we stayed in that position. My mind was a blurry haze as his gaze penetrated mine. The only two things I could fully comprehend were his eyes and the warmth of his hands on my skin.

I would miss that warmth.

Before I knew it, my tears were streaming down my face.

"Bella?" Jacob asked his alarm, his eyes filled with worry. The innocent worry on his face only made me cry harder.

"I… I'll miss you too much," I managed to gasp. "I want to be with him, but I don't want to have to leave you. Because you're my best friend, and I love you so… so much! And one day you're going to… die." I choked, but continued. "And I won't be able to stand it… I'll miss you… being with you, hearing your jokes, seeing your smile… your warmth…"

As I was speaking, I hadn't noticed that Jacob had gently picked me up and was now carrying me in his arms to some unknown destination.

"Jake?" I asked. "Where are we going?"

A slight smile crept on his face. "You'll see."

I rested my head against his chest and waited for him to stop, still too fazed by my overwhelming emotions to make any comment. All I could feel was the wind rushing by, and the heat of Jacob's hold on me.

And then he stopped. I lifted my head to observe where he had taken me.

Before me was the vertical drop of the cliff falling into the waves of the ocean.

"Cliff diving," Jacob explained before setting my down on my feet.

"We're going to jump?" I asked nervously. I hadn't forgotten what happened the last time I hurled myself off this cliff.

Jacob's hands gently help my face again, and I turned to look at him.

"I promised to take you cliff diving a long time ago. So I need to keep this promise before it's too late.

"I don't want you to spend the last days of your human life worrying about the future. I want you to live the moment as much as you can, so hopefully these human memories of us won't fade away for you.

"I don't want you to leave me, but eventually you'll have no choice. So until that very moment, I want to stay by your side. I'll stay with you, until the very end."

He gently pulled me into a tight hug and rested his chin on the top of my head, stroking my hair. I suddenly felt relaxed, comforted by his gentle show of affection.

I heard him say quietly, "Because I love you, and I don't want you to be afraid."

I backed up and looked up at him, trying to lift the mood, and asked, "So cliff diving is now the answer to all of life's problems?"

He grinned back at me. "Maybe."

I cautiously looked down into the crashing waves of the ocean. "It's such a far drop…"

He smiled and took my hand. "I'm here." He looked at my face for a moment, then gently stroked a tear on my cheek away with his thumb. I hadn't even realized I'd been crying.

"Bella Swan?" he asked. "Will you jump? With me?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"On three?" He stood closer to the edge, and I stood next to him.

"One…"

I felt another tear fall.

"Two…"

Our hands tightened their hold on each other.

"Three."

And then we were flying.

The weightlessness, the rush… Everything was just like last time. And yet, it was so much better.

This time, I was fully conscious of what was coming. I knew that in a few seconds, I would plunge into the freezing cold ocean, and that if Jacob wasn't there I would probably drown.

But now I wasn't worrying. I only had a few precious moments left here, with my tears falling upwards into the sky, and the two of us flying through the air, feeling this sheer joy and… freedom. And I knew I would never feel this way again. I had to love this moment, and live it fully.

I wasn't afraid.

And I had no reason to be afraid either, because Jacob was next to me, holding my hand. I knew that no matter what, he would never truly leave me. He would always be there, by my side, until we were forced apart. And even after that, he would always be my best friend, and would be doing everything he could to come back to me, to support me. I had complete faith in him.

The clouds shifted, and the bright golden sun broke through and illuminated everything as far as my sight could take me. The ocean sparkled, and the air radiated with warmth. Warmth just like Jacob's.

The sun was the last thing I saw before Jacob and I plunged into the icy depths of the unknown.


End file.
